Day 8 – uphill


Today was a very mixed day.  Day 8 so far.  Woohoo!  Celebration!  Bring on 14!  I’m starting to get more energy too, which is nice to feel.  I decided to celebrate how far I’ve come and what I’ve achieved so far that I ‘treated’ myself to a black coffee (which I normally have).  I didn’t enjoy it.  At all.  What is the world coming to???  First, Trump is president of the USA and I don’t enjoy coffee??!!  Super surprised by that.  Also, it’s blood freezing where I live and I really wanted a hot cup of miso.  So I did.  Yes, technically not on the water fasting protocol so bit of an oopsie.

What did happen today was that it was the first time I’ve been out with friends who were eating and drinking.  There they were, chowing down sweet potato and paprika chip, drinking wine and beer.  And there I was, sipping on my sparkling water.  It was REALLY hard and it made me a bit upset too.  Not because they were eating, but because I couldn’t join in and eat some yummy food.  Ok, I could’ve broken my fast and eaten the chips.  But to me, weighing up the short term misery I felt while they were eating Vs the hours of self-depreciating and self-hating talk that would follow – it just wasn’t worth it.  Now this was a really test for me.  I have always been “oh a little bit won’t hurt” or totally into the instant gratification and worry about the consequences later.  So this was a new thought process and experience for me.  Which is super cool!  After all, this whole shebang is a new experience!  But what I took away from it was how much I emphasis I have put on eating and food and being social, participating etc.  It’s only on reflection that I realise that because I was a little bit surly while they were eating and a bit afterwards.  It just hit home to me that SO much socialising revolves around food.  Have we got our priorities wrong?  Should it be friends first and food secondary?  How many people spends aaaaaaaages trying to find the ‘right’ restaurant to go to?  Instead of being make the most of being with the people we care about, we seem to make our social life and our life in general revolved around food.  Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

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